Trauma

Everyone has trauma, rather it is be small, big or just annoying. Everyone also has to live life every day. So how do we live life after trauma ? For starters, I'm sure most that have had trauma have been to a counselor, or journaled or did a ton of shadow work. I do shadow work all the time. I spent many years in therapy, I did all kinds of stuff to feel better and start the healing process to get to a place where everything is good.

To fit into society standards we all have to function enough to work, take care of kids, eat every day, you know: function. But do we actually function? Or do we just do the things and get through the day, most of the time just barley. Just barley is where I used to be. Sometimes I still am. Then the weekend hits and the list is so long that you don't even want to get out of bed Saturday morning! But being we have to function it's time to start. Overwhelming to me to even write this.  

So is this living life after trauma? Maybe, until we start to learn lessons about what is important in life.  So for me my first lesson was " life is about the Journey not the destination". Life is messy. If you think of it this way all that other stuff does not mean a thing. We are never going to one day say I completed it all! Everything is done; life is normal. Not that I wasn't  expecting that, I was. I was setting myself up for failure before I even got started. Think about it this way, If you have trauma life feels like gravity and is pulling you down just a little more every day. So start that counseling, take up journaling, start the healing process but don't just start and say yup one day it is all going to be normal because it's not! Yes you have to put in the work, but you have to live your life like you want. So why break your back to get it all done, why not slow down and enjoy life. Trauma is going to be there no matter what is going on. Does that mean I can't enjoy my life? No!!!!  Don’t tell yourself once my house is clean, one I buy a house, once I have whatever goal you think you need to hit before you start living life like you want, you will end up wasting a whole life that your waiting to live because you haven't hit that next goal or next big thing you need to start living. LIVE NOW!  

So the next big question is HOW. I know I asked it. Let's start with a new perspective. What are you grateful for right now. In this moment as your reading what do you have to be grateful for? Need some help? How about the clothes your wearing, or the favorite drink most people have sitting next to them? How about the air your breathing? Or the partner next to you? Or the best friend? Or I could go on forever with this. Now list them. That’s right get a pen and paper and list it out! Being grateful for what you have now is important. Feel how important it is. Plant your feet on the ground in front of you. Take a deep breath. Feel the floor under your feet. You are here now. You are important. Think about that grateful moment or thing and then think about what everyone else's grateful list might be. Someone is grateful for you. Yes they are! 

 As I go through and write this I remember how long this took me to understand and do something about. Now that I have, I can sit in a completely messy world and look around and feel good about the sun shining, or the beautiful snowy picture when I look out the window. I see beauty were it wasn’t before. It is not going to be perfect and this is ok.

As I finish this post I want everyone reading and following along to know I am not perfect. I may say things you do not agree with, that is okay. I love interaction, ask questions. Ask me whatever comes to mind while reading.  My goal here is to give and receive insight. I want to help. I want to talk it out. I want to understand how you feel and work through whatever it is I can to help you with because it helps me with my journey also. That being said please be respectful to everyone that joins us here. We can be respectful and still disagree. As I end this I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!